let me sexplain

let me sexplain how i acquired the plague.
so i was chugging the booze- beer mostly- with chris and the rest of the 196 soundbeach blvd crew and we went to the parade. it was deliciously delightful when chris and scott walked in the parade- also when all of us were snagging the starbursts that were being thrown to the children behind us by girlscouts. funny how my reflexes are sharpened when i am hammered.
walking home, i had the most intense desire to kick the spit out of the puddles- all the puddles- as i often do. in my zeal i took a headfirts spill into this fat ogre of a puddle-

dude, this thing was oceanic. once my head was fully submerged, i think i may have very well seen a deep sea fish with the loopy flesh thing hanging over its teethy mouth. i honestly can't say that this was the deepest puddle i have fallen in while i was intoxicated, but it definatly is a contender for second or third. this time, however wasn't a warm spring day- i walked home with my hypothermia tucked away in my pocket hoping it wouldn't get out and tell all of its disease friends about me. apparently it did. but the plague is kinda hot, right?

like i always say----

a little pain neva hurt nobody