feed yourself.

here are the quite possible circumstances of my conception->
(in an order contrived by a madman)

It was a bribe
The cloud i was conceived on was dry and cold
The sex was stale
Frogs and crickets screamed loudly to match the volume of the inmates in the nearby jailhouse...
I was not a mistake
My makers were in love
I am made from music, snapped twigs, and too much wine.
The whole thing was a lousy joke.

The settings, plots, and misgivings of my childhood

After living in a banana throughout infancy, I was shipped off to a college dorm, stuffed into an Atari, and primarly was raised by a 4-bit creature named PacMan.
->I was malnourished and could not live on computer bisuit morsals.
-> i was sent home
-> I spoke computer speak and only ate fruit- i was very well-spoken and cultured for my age
-> i thought in shapes
-> i was not amused by anything


Pre-teenage wasteland
->I was very lame
->as an amputee, I could not dance to Paula Abdul or Janet Jackson. i cried for seconds.
->Cyndi Lauper was a guest at my 12th birthday part.
->I sowed oats on my farm. i counted the maggots on each grain.
I plucked them off and placed them in a Maxwell House coffe tin (sharp and rusty)
they were my family.
Forever grateful to invertebrates
-> I learned that fingers can push, slide,scratch, pet, and rub-> gently or roughly-> in sixth grade camp.
->I learned that sperm was another name for poison
-> I read all the time

A teenage milkmade in heaven
-Prostitution dissapointed me
- I took up the clarinet
- I threw it back down again
- I had nothing to my name except too many letters
- I ran away to Paris->became rich overnight - I felt like such a fool.
- I fell in love- I felt like such a fool.
- High school was four years of continuous nausea(i was now back in America-> i became very rude and very stupid)
- I bathed everyday
- I never forgave myself for it

My Adulteryhood->
I was arrested for knowing too little about how the world works->i was sentence to a dizzy life in jail with 98% of the American population.
There, i fell in love 301 times.
Each time was magnificently worse than the previous
I had a child
I made a flute from the bones of her finger
I went to sleep
My bed became damp and rusty